The Flip Side of Gratitude: Giving Thanks Even When It Hurts

There’s something bittersweet about November. While the world around us leans into sweaters and spices and table settings, many of us are quietly nursing wounds. Some are grieving losses. Others are walking through uncertainty. And some, like I’ve been in seasons past, are simply feeling unseen in the middle of all the noise.

And yet, we are invited to give thanks.

It’s easy to be grateful when things are going well, when prayers are answered and doors open. But what about the moments when nothing looks like what you hoped? What does Thanksgiving look like when your heart is still tender?

This is the flip side of gratitude—the kind that stretches you, the kind that costs you something.

When I Didn’t Feel Thankful

I remember a season not too long ago when things were uncertain with my work. My contract was ending, and I had no clear direction about what was next. I had bills to pay, commitments already made, and a heart full of dreams for Claimed By Him—but the future was foggy. I couldn’t see a way forward.

And if I’m being honest, my thoughts didn’t immediately go to gratitude. They went to control. To worry. To “what ifs.” I had faith, yes—but I also had fear.

I was overthinking, under-trusting, and leaning heavily on my own understanding. My prayers sounded more like planning sessions, and my thanksgiving was tied to how well things turned out.

God had to quiet the noise in my head just to get my heart to listen.

Lessons from the Shadows

As I reflected on some of the lesser-known characters in the Bible while writing The Flip Side, I found myself deeply drawn to people like Bathsheba and Job’s wife—individuals who have been misunderstood, minimized, or passed over in scripture. But their pain was real. Their losses were deep. Their voices, if we pause to listen, hold lessons for us too.

Take Job’s wife, for example. She is often judged for her one sentence: “Curse God and die.” But imagine standing in her shoes. She had lost her children, her home, her stability, and now she was watching her husband waste away in suffering. While Job’s faith stood strong, she cracked under the weight of grief.

Haven’t we all had those moments?

Moments where gratitude felt impossible… because the pain was too loud?

Yet here’s the grace: even in our breaking, God is still near. He’s not waiting for perfect praise. He’s looking for honest surrender.

Thankfulness on the Other Side

The more I walked through my own uncertain season, the more I began to see that God wasn’t just asking me to give thanks for the outcome—He was teaching me to give thanks in the middle of it. Not when things were resolved, but while the questions were still lingering.

That’s hard. But it’s holy.

1 Thessalonians 5:18 reminds us:

“In everything give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”

It doesn’t say for everything. It says in everything.

Giving thanks in everything is an act of trust. It says, “God, I don’t understand this, but I trust You’re still good.” It’s not pretending everything’s fine—it’s proclaiming that even if it’s not, God is still faithful.

That’s the kind of gratitude that reshapes your soul.

The Deeper Reward

When I began thanking God, not just for the solution, but for His presence in the problem, something shifted. My situation didn’t change overnight, but my perspective did. And that was the real breakthrough.

Gratitude began to silence the fear. It reminded me of His past faithfulness and gave me confidence for tomorrow. It taught me to see the diamonds He was dropping all around me—even in the discomfort.

Sometimes the most powerful praise we can offer is the one that comes through tears.

So if you’re reading this and walking through your own “flip side” moment—if Thanksgiving feels heavy this year—I want to remind you: God sees you. He hasn’t overlooked your pain or skipped over your prayers.

And He’s not asking for polished perfection. He’s simply inviting you to look up and whisper a thank-you, even if it shakes in your throat.

Because that kind of praise? That kind of faith?

It moves heaven.

And it transforms you.

With grace and gratitude,Lisa